I'm teaching a breakout in a little over a week at Lifeway's National Youth Worker Conference. The breakout is called "Working with Parents as a Younger Minister." I asked for some feedback via Twitter/Facebook and was asked if I could share people's responses. The question I threw out there was "what's your one piece of advice to a youth pastor in their 20's when it comes to working with parents?" Here you go!

Twitter:
joshtreece@mikelovato There is no such thing as OVERcommunicating! There is more parent ministry in youth ministry than you think! Talk to them!
mikekell@mikelovato Keep bringing it back to Biblical Truth. Stand on that authority.
samgamgee@mikelovato build strategic relationships...they can be your best of allies
kenleslie@mikelovato Advice: They must acknowledge they DO NOT know how to RAISE a teenager, but they can help parents UNDERSTAND their culture
thespiderman@mikelovato remember that they are probably pretty set in their ways and change comes hard when they've been parenting as long as they have
stephenperryParent ministry can't be viewed as a program but a mindset.
also-constantly challenge your thinking and process to figure out ways/outlets for dialogue to happen at home based on what you teach...

Facebook:
- when talking about their children, use lots of profanity... just to catch them off guard.
- Get them on your leadership team so that you learn from them, develop rapport with them, and get their support for the ministry.
- Realize that your "20s" are quickly becoming a thing of the past! They don't see you as a kid anymore, so don't see yourself that way.
- don't think you know it all...don't be arrogant...cause you will learn in time young jedi
- Let them know you found out they were right. Whatever the question was...just let them know that you now know they were right. It is amazing but they will then admit when they were wrong. It works.
- Ask them to be involved in their kids lives. Ask them where they would like to help, food, sponsors, leadership. Tell them your goals and plans and ask them to get involved.
- Constantly communicate that you are their ally; that you don't have any desire to take their place but only to supplement their best efforts to disciple their children. Also, that you are a constant student of students and want to be a resource of information & support for them as they negotiate the challenging (& terrifying to some) task of leading their children through the maze of adolescence and into responsible adulthood.

Labels: parents, youth ministry

Had a pretty good parents meeting on Sunday night. I've learned a couple things lately about these thanks to a couple guys at the PDYM Gathering. I think these are now my goals for future parent meetings:

Let parents hear my heart - I want parents to know that we're not just going through the motions. I'm excited about our ministry and I want them to hear that.

Let parents know what's going on - I want them to have a basic understanding of the purposes of our different programs. Also, I want them to know the goals of different upcoming events.

Let parents ask questions (one on one) - My goal in this meeting was to give them 15-20 minutes of info, dismiss them, and then let anyone with questions stick around and talk to me. I got this basic idea from Lyndale (although I think he does a group Q&A time with those who stay). Well, it was a good plan but a hand went up and we went into a Q&A time that I was trying to avoid. Next time, I'm going to emphasize harder that I'll sit down with anyone and answer questions they have. We're just not going to turn it into an opportunity for everyone to share their opinion with everybody.

Labels: parents, youth ministry

Four things I'm doing right now to raise the level of parent communication in our high school ministry:

1. Monthly Parent E-mail - includes upcoming dates, a short note from me, and a parenting article from HomeWord.

2. Fall Calendar Mailing - well, I wanted to do this one, but our calendar's a bit of an odd shape and envelopes were pricey so I sent a postcard instead telling them some current info and to pick up a calendar on Sunday. I also included a blurb in a newsletter that goes to our adult Bible study classes.

3. Parents Meeting - we're doing an hour-long parents meeting on the 23rd. I'll go over some basic vision and purpose for their ministry as well as give them a chance to ask questions and have some discussion about their (and their student's) biggest needs.

4. Website - been trying to keep a close eye on the website so it stays up to date. That's one of those things that can slip by really easily, but it can also make a really bad impression on parents if all the events listed are from June.

How do you communicate with parents?

Labels: parents, youth ministry